Chapter 10: Whichever world I'm working for.

The world is in the midst of multiple social crises and I'm sitting here earnestly trying to discern how I can make a living trying to get laid... without technically being a gigolo.

My point is, My head is focussed on small things while bigger and bigger things loom on the periphery. But that's the story of the world, and especially this blog.

I have indeed been getting a bit more delirious as this so-called vacation wears on. Much of the time I'm babbling incoherently and/or wandering aimlessly, or babbling aimlessly and wandering incoherently. And it seems like there's a pretty good chance I've got scurvy, but I'm not worrying about that right now.

There was a time when I had a great deal of confidence in my writing. I could sit down and write prose or poetry or scripts that would pretty much blow your mind. Perhaps due to being caught up in this whole journalism thing, I've dulled my once-razorsharp ability somewhat, although I'm at least confident in my recent journalistic works. I've taken to my Scene and Heard assignments (which will be posted, I've learned, this week!) with a great deal of alacrity; and you can savour that Writer's Craft word. We used to pwn those words.

Motivation, down. Creativity, down. Coherence, waaay thefuckdown.

I want to write a mystery/crime/thriller/noir book from the ending, just start with the last chapter and work backwards and pretend like it all makes sense. I think I've already found that novels aren't my strong suit. They're a lot of money and there's virtually no money in them. Well, LuLu.com might love me.

The family gathering went surprisingly well, considering the drama going in. Aunt Lori in particular was quite cordial. Of course, we still had to get up reeeeal early and gun it all the way to Palmerston for a 10:30 church service for which we were a little under-dressed. Personally, I've never felt so out of place in my entire life as when I'm surrounded by old people singing about Jesus and pretending to connect with their faith. Not that I don't like Jesus, but the beliefs espoused by the United Church of Palmerston or any denomination for that matter hardly resonate with my own personal beliefs. However, I restrained myself from openly mocking the service, and instead paid great attention to the Minister's sermon on the anxiety felt by Joseph and Mary when they lost Jesus for 3 days and he turned up in a church and was like, "Duh, this is my dad's house." Okay I don't believe Jesus ever actually said "Duh," but he probably should have.

Anyway, the afternoon was very sunny and pleasant lunch affair with some family interaction mostly in the form of Muskoka chairs and someone making sure to keep an eye on the kids while they played on the swingset.

I'm gonna go try to break my creative slump.

Keep on rockin'
-Scott