Seven: Fake British accent

For no reason today I was practicing my fake British accent.

I don't know why. I consider myself pretty decent at them, and at one point my British friend Claire admitted I was. There's a few different ones, although notably I never really got the hang of imitating my grandparents, who had a distinct Northern accent. But generally-speaking, a Ricky Gervais-style accent is at least consistent. There's also Yorkshire, Liverpool, Manchester, and of course, Scotland, Ireland, Wales, the latter two I can't do. Scotland I'm okay and the first three your mileage may vary. Basically, I'm basing my accents off various members of Monty Python and various skits therein.

No reason for this. None at all.

British people are way better at doing American accents. Except on Monty Python, oddly enough, where their occasional American accents were way hammy.

As a Canadian, I find myself in an odd position. If I were to act in, say, an American television show (not that I'm an actor) my Canadian accent would be probably a bit noticeable in places. I don't say "aboat" for "about" (which is what many people think we pronounce as "aboot") but I do inflect my vowels a certain way that I have to think consciously about in order to sound more American. Usually it's a matter just sounding more cocky and putting more emphasis on certain syllables. Like, say, a Southern Accent is one thing, but to do a good generic Midwest "Heartland" accent, you have to really work at it to make it subtle. Whereas a British accent would just be an out and out fake, as opposed to an affectation, which is what an American one would be.

When I was in Grade 12, and auditioning for Fringe plays, Ana asked me to do the audition piece in a British accent, then cast me in her (as of then unwritten) play. I actually ended up writing it for her as a gift, but by then it was too late. I've told the story various times. I wonder whether she ever considered anyone else for the British play director character. I know Barrett didn't consider anyone else for the role he cast me in (Vernon, from the Breakfast Club, natch) because he didn't even audition anyone else for the part. That, I thought, was nutty. I think he was the only one who saw me in that role beforehand, myself included. But I did enjoy it. Would've rather been Bender, but who wouldn't?

I have been all over nowhere these past few days. Truth. A couple nights ago I wrote a couple stories: one only a couple hundred words long, one a couple thousand. Very satisfied with the shorter one. The longer one, I know exactly what's wrong with it. The narrator gets too opinionated. I do this a lot in first drafts. I try to use the narrator to explain exactly what I'm getting at, partly as my own reference point.

The stories are by and large about not being able to understand other people. That should be obvious. I shouldn't feel the need to have the characters summarize it in every story. But I write it, I write it as progression and then I cut out what doesn't work.

Beyond thinking about writing, I've just been kicking around town. I went to get a haircut the other day, but my girl has already gone on maternity leave (not surprising) so I had to get a stranger to do it. I go to my "girl" not just because I like the way she cuts my hair, but because we have good chemistry and the experience never feels awkward for me. This was every awkward barber moment I've had for years back to haunt me. It also looks weirdly short, but that kind of always happens anyway. Then I felt so old with the short hair and the goatee, I shaved my face and took about 10 years off my age. Lastly, when I tried to vent to Amanda about any of this, she pulled the "Yeah, well it takes me way longer to get my hair done (because she's a girl, you see) so count yourself lucky." Thanks, Amanda. Good friend.

I have my last exam tomorrow. Not psyched but I'll be happy to have it over with. It's American Fiction, which is something I don't need to study too much for but a re-reading of my notes on the train wouldn't hurt anybody.

It'll just be good to be done with it, and be done with school on a more or less ongoing basis for the first time in years -- by that I mean, not even Summer School, and therefore having a break longer than three weeks. Nothing on my mind except work, video games, and whatever creative projects spring to mind. And oh there are a lot of them.

I mean it's weird. I haven't exactly been devoting all my time to studying, but my enthusiasm for my various projects hasn't been stellar either. It's just because I have this cloud hanging overhead, there's this invisible Elephant in the room called studying. After tomorrow that is GONE. I can write, and read, and play Mario, with impunity.

So I've got this webcomic I may be setting up. I'm thinking a lot about it. And stories, as always. And more and more, the idea of just outright re-writing the new play from scratch seems appealing. One comment Cary made back in December, that he just plain didn't like one character's dialogue (even though he liked the character himself he said "I don't like any of his lines") struck me. Maybe I could do better. Maybe not. But I could stand to try.

The thing behind that is, the premise and overall concept of the play has expanded yet I've tried to keep all the original lines intact as much as possible. Why not just overhaul it? Shit. Might as well.

I also keep coming back to this other play idea I had during the course of Post-WWII drama. But one thing at a time. Well, who the fuck am I kidding. I'm not quite a "one thing at a time" guy, but I should at least limit it to one play at a time.

The plan, as I see it, is this: Finish this play, then write the other one and if I get it done in time, submit them both to the Fringe festival. If both get in, decline whichever I wanted to do less. Assuming there's not a prohibitive submission fee (doubtful) I don't see the harm.

I'll... I'll be better next week.

Keep on rockin'
-Scotto