12th: In the Spirit

Interesting that I only just got around to posting that trailer post now, more than a week after we returned. The rest of the trip proceeded along those lines. We swam a lot, I was nostalgic a lot, the propane tank went out on Wednesday, we got bit by mosquitoes, we watched Ratatouille. We played cards and listened to the radio.

I think the propane thing kind of spoiled it for us because as much as we were already having difficulties, it was what it was, until then. But the tank went out right when I was making breakfast, which had already been delayed by my trip into town for syrup -- we were using our bananas to make banana pancakes out of only eggs and bananas -- and it just kind of set us off and made us think "Are we gonna make it to Friday?" We decided to play it by ear as we enjoyed a nice fire Wednesday night, but by Thursday morning we were pretty sure it was our last day there.

Still, we made the best of it, swimming again and kayaking and walking around the park. In my private moments I thought about things adults did to have fun when I was a kid, like bingo and softball. We packed quite a bit into our last day considering how much cleanup and packing we had to do before we left. Mom seemed dismayed that we weren't staying longer -- unsure if she had planned on meeting us there, or if she just kinda took it personally. But she did express surprise and delight that we had cleaned the place so well. We like to be good guests.

I wouldn't say it was because there was no wifi. Was that a challenge? Yeah, but you can buy into it. It is good to have your phone handy to blow off steam or play music or to watch Netflix in bed. I did get a little kooky with the stopping-by-aunts-trailer to borrow wifi in the morning, because I'm got my morning content rituals. Anyway. I've always said that under the best of circumstances 3-4 days is probably best for the trailer and I'm always advocating for less than a whole week when we go up there and Mel thinks I'm just being a poop. We raced home -- I drove us! And Mel didn't seem to hate it! -- and we ordered pizza and began a nice weekend. Mel had friends over both days, BoPo girls on Saturday and her former co-worker Gina on Sunday. I made myself scarce, got some writing done.

The week passed -- it was overly full, catching up on things and having way too many little fires to fight. That said, there were some times for doing my own thing and I even made headway on my Staff Picks project, for the first time in way too long. We played Softball on Tuesday. It was actually a good game, and we won. More importantly, I had fun, which means I got on base at least once and didn't screw up any major plays. And even more importantly, my body didn't give out on me. I'll admit, the excitement of the early season has mostly given way to anxiety of "What's going to happen?" before each game. It feels a lot like it used to when I was learning to drive and I'd know I had to have a practice session.

While we were away, they played two games, winning the first one. Since that was the first game they'd won since Week 1, it made me feel a little low since it almost seemed like Mel and I were holding them back. I actually know that's not true for several reasons: 1) We played our worst on that first game that we lost 2) We've come close to winning several times, where Mel and I were not really the difference makers. Admittedly, having better players in our slots may have helped but we're not anchors. Hell, even when I got back, when drawing up the lineup one teammate said they should move me up because I get on base a lot. It's nice to be recognized. No pressure though...

So when they lost without us, that kind of evened things out. And when we won this game that Mel and I were in, it felt good. I'll admit, when the time comes to field I am out in deep right hoping the ball comes nowhere near me. In the final inning, up by one, I kind of pushed one of my teammates, Chris, out onto the field (there were 12 of us, so two guys and one girl always sat.) I knew this guy would have more impact on the game than I would and I felt like this was our best shot at stopping them. The other team got some really good hits in and it started to look dodgy, but before they could score any runs to tie up the game, who caught the game-winning pop fly? Chris. I don't need glory on the softball field; making things like that happen is my glory. Let's be realistic. Not everyone can be the hero of the game.

Winning isn't everything. It's not even necessarily more fun to win than to lose, although losing can be frustrating. Doing your best as a group and having someone stop you can be frustrating. But doing your best and having fun are the main things and I've had fun in games we've lost, for sure. Just not on the field. I almost never have fun when I have to field. Or run the bases, really. Actually, can we just go to the batting cages?

On Thursday, I made the trek downtown to go to the dentist. Honestly, the sensible thing is to get a dentist near me but I like my dentist very much. She's non-judgmental and easy to work with and gosh darnit she spent so much time on my mouth last year, we're bonded. At one point I considered going in to the office and then dipping out for the appointment but I decided I didn't want to get up early. Once I got out of the appointment at 3, I figured I still had time to grab lunch and go to the office, my first time since like November. Part of the reason I was so driven to go to the office was that there were a few items I wanted to make sure I grabbed: a book that was supposed to be waiting for me on someone's desk, and my bamboo utensils. Luckily, the book really was waiting there for me, despite having teed it up last fall with the person to whom I had lent this book prior to the pandemic. (Stranger in the Woods, the story of the Last True Hermit, perfect pandemic reading.) The one thing that wasn't at my desk was actually... my desk. In the meantime, my computer has been updated and my workstation was not placed back where it originally was, so I actually don't know where my computer/workstation resides. I didn't really have time to ask anyone about that or see any point in doing so, so I just quickly ate my lunch (Burger Priest, yum!) and left.

Whenever I'm in the city, I do think about things I miss. For a few years I could feign being a city person but let's face it, I am a suburbanite loser. There's an energy that I do miss, and yet a hassle that I don't. But I do miss seeing tons of different people, as an inveterate people-watcher. You just don't see people in the 'burbs that much and if you do, in like the supermarket, it's too creepy to spend much time watching them. I don't know whether that will ever be my world again, even as a commute. It feels like COVID stole from me my last great summer of people-watching, which is admittedly low on the list of things that it has stolen from people, but I can at least lament a mild disappointment here on my blog.

This weekend was marked mostly by Saturday's trek out to Midtown Toronto for an in-person BoPo workout in the park and picnic. It was hot as hell but nice to participate in that, even if we have a tendency to take "picnic" more seriously than other people. Of course, seeing our cooler did raise eyebrows but I pointed out that with our drive, if we hadn't had a cooler we'd be drinking boiling hot iced tea.

Mel was pretty drained from the drive home and it ended up sending her to bed early. Today was going to have a bunch of tasks to it, but ended up being defined by a dead bunny that was left on our doorstep (I think by the neighbor's cat... I think.) And having to call a private animal removal service because ha ha, it's the weekend, the city won't answer. We kind of got hosed and even had to do some of the cleanup ourselves by bleaching the porch. I understand leaving that to us overall, but the guy was not even going to tell us what to do about that last streak of entrails, he was in his car ready to go when I came out to ask "Uh, what do I do about this now?" He has pretty good reviews but I'll have to put in my experience.

The other thing was Laura and Ryan stopping by since they had to bring Ryan's car to the mechanic at Canadian Tire. It wasn't too big a thing but it was a nice little visit.

Anyway. The day, the weekend, the life, it was what it was. This all took a very long time to write because hey, it's been knocking around my head for a while. And that's only scratching the surface of the shit I could be putting here. Aren't you glad I'm posting semi-regularly again?

Keep on rockin'

-Scotto