Three: I can't account for it

A quick one tonight. I'm considering going to bed at a relatively early time and I thought, how remiss would I be if I didn't try to bang out a pointless entry, like in the olden days? These days, I sit around and wait for stuff to happen, so time drags on between entries and I end up summarizing everything anyway.

This weekend wasn't much of a weekend. There's some sickness going around, mom's felt ill since Friday. Max is going senile, walking in circles intermittently all week. Me, losing patience for the things I wish weren't so. And procrastinating. Nothing special.

Saturday, after seeing Amanda, and everything else, dinner at dad's. He came over afterward to fiddle with my computer. There was this whole thing with a motherboard and a DVD burner and it was all over my head anyway. It amounted to him spending three hours re-wiring my system. To entertain myself while he did that (since I would normally have spent those three hours on the computer, doing nothing in particular,) I played Guitar Hero 4 - mostly songs I thought dad might appreciate; Hotel California, Ramblin' Man, Sweet Home Alabama (at which I lost, on expert.) Around that point my wrist got tired and I decided just to watch episodes of Flight of the Conchords on OnDemand, which he seemed to like, actually. Never can tell when dad will respond to something. Odd tastes.

Anyway, eventually things get sorted out, but now the resolution on my monitor's out of whack because I need a new video card. This is why people say "If it ain't broke, don't fix it." Whenever something gets fiddled with on my computer, one or two other things also suddenly need jostling. One problem after another. "Don't get a car," advises Julie. I laugh. Like I needed another reason not to get a car. I'd still like to get my G1 very very soon. More pressing matters, though.

I have a lot on my plate and not a lot going on. Every tiny insignificant thing seems to stress me way out of proportion. It's hard to articulate - oddly enough, a word I had to search my mind for all day. Articulate. Go figure.

This is the kind of stuff that causes people to withdraw into themselves, but I think it would be nice if I don't do that. If I stand my ground and take every goddamn thing as it comes. Yes, I will write out my prospectus for my history paper, and we'll fix my computer up and do my reading and before you know it it'll be the break and I will be able to refresh myself. Something tells me I'll need more than a week to recover my sanity, but a week will have to do.

Friday night was weird. I hardly slept, and when I was, I had this ridiculous dream about this girl I used to know (haven't spoken to her in what seems like years.) We were lying in bed - which was in the middle of a mall - talking. Just talking. It reminds me of a line in Half-Past (a new one) which Cary loved, "Are you such a prude that you don't even want to get laid in your own dream?" Apparently so.

Things are bad and good all at once these days. There's potential and there's pain. Life is contradictions my friends. If I don't go to bed soon I won't have gone to bed early at all. I bought a new iPod dock. I hope it works.

Keep on rockin'
-Scott