Chapter One: Adventures in the Eternal Present

A quick one before I go off to school for the day. I'm feeling a bit bummed out about my place in life. I've got that general sense of "what am I doing?" And all that. I don't feel particularly impressed with myself - neither for the actual factos of my life, nor the fact that I am actually getting down about it.

I guess I just figured that by 22 I'd be further along. I was gonna be a whizkid, a child prodigy writer. Doesn't seem to work that way but you know, I haven't spent enough energy trying to make it work, anyway.

I also have yet to move out, and some female companionship would be nice...

My friend Julie has introduced me to this girl. I actually dig her, and she seems to dig me, and this isn't one of those fake-seeming "Oh maybe we'll meet up" online acquaintances because there's someone bridging the two of us. Well it's kind of a cheat to say that, because after all, Julie was one of those online acquaintances and in fact I have yet to meet her in person. But we've come to be fairly good friends over the last 8 months or so.

I don't know what else to say other than this looks to be the first opportunity I've had in a while that can actually work. She lives way out there, but at some undefined point in the future (as in, the process is slowly underway) she's moving to Toronto. Geography has often been my enemy but I have the run of most of that city, if I've got good reason to.

I don't know why I'm so down, though. Maybe I'm not, I just don't have the energy to bring myself up. After all, the play is going awesomely, the cast is amazing and everyone is going to love it. This is going to work. I may actually have a future in this, although let's not get ahead of ourselves, this is just one potential hit. Still. I'm not really in a bad place, things could just be better. It's up to me if I want to make the effort to make them better.

The title of this entry relates back to my short story class last week, which the Prof invited the writer, Joe Davies, to come read at. I didn't mention it in the last post because it was already plenty full and this seemed less important. He'd written a story in the present tense, that moved back and forth along the timeline, and Prof. Kuhn used the phrase "eternal present" and I liked it.

That class makes me want to write, and to be a better writer. The thing I'm slowly and repeatedly learning about prose is that it's not always about how good the story is, but how interestingly it is told.

I try. I like to think I've got potential.

Well, speaking of class, I have to get going now. It's certainly keeping me busy, although I'm not staying on the ball as much as I ought to. Tests this week. We'll see.

Keep on rockin'
-Scott