32: Sitting in a dark cavern underground with my fingers in my ears

Still not using the title I had figured would be the next one, but it's in my pocket for later.

I don't even know where to begin. The real world has been a stressful place lately, difficult to navigate. A lot of the times my problems are my own doing due to obliviousness, haplessness, lack of planning, but right now, I'm in the hell of other people. There's some light on the other side of the tunnel, but... hm.

I started this post two days ago on Friday (Oct 31) afternoon, became diverted from it, and just got back to it. A lot's already happened, so let me start at the end and work my way back.

Last night was Game 7 of the World Series, in which the Toronto Blue Jays hosted the LA Dodgers. The Blue Jays making it to the Series -- and seemingly having a shot to win it -- obviously caused a buzz in our sphere. Game 6 was held on Halloween night and we elected not to watch even though it could have been the night that the Jays won the championship. We had a recording on and instead decided, while we gave out candy (although trick or treating was mostly done by the time the game came on) to watch Fear Street, which was a surprisingly dark and gory take on RL Stine material. I wasn't sure what to make of it but by the end of the second one I was quite enjoying it and looking forward to the third. Plus the music supervisor really earned their paycheck (Mel actively squealed with delight when they played "Machinehead" -- too briefly for her tastes -- in the 1994 instalment.) 

Anyway. The Jays didn't win that night, going to Saturday's Game 7, at which time we were going to be at my dad's for Eric's birthday. There was some fuss over the whole thing as we had originally planned to go see our friends from BoPo on the long-delayed couples dinner that night but Namita is a huge baseball fan there was no way she would go out if there was a Game 7, and we ended up cancelling before we knew one way or the other. So much the better. It was fixing a nice, quiet night -- kind of -- as Dad and Deb were hosting Deb's high school friend Cathy (she didn't specify whether it was with a C or a K) an RMT who lives on a farm near Listowel and had some clients in Mississauga, so she didn't want to drive home in the dark. That's a fair situation and very kind of  dad and Deb, but somewhat inconvenient as this was after all both a family gathering and sure to be a long night. I should also note that the dinner was originally scheduled for Sunday night, which would have made a big difference (and convenient for us since we are going to Oakville again today for Mel's hair appointment) but Eric was only available for Saturday and it's kind of important he be there.

Kathy... a very nice lady, but somehow the living embodiment of Wellington county. Really, very salt of the Earth and well-meaning, but perhaps not someone I would want to spend 6 hours with, four of which were watching a ballgame, which I should note she was very into, cheering on the players and demanding they hit home runs and throw strikes. Also not-infrequently asking what inning it was.

Anyway, with or without that it was very exciting, until the Jays slipped late in the game and ended up losing in the 11th inning. What are you gonna do. The bats just weren't batting, after a certain point. WE finally got home around, what, 12:30, after quickly dispersing once the game was over, in a haze of despondency. For Mel and I, who were the least invested, we just wanted to get to bed.

The upside of sports though is that they give you something to think about other than your own problems, of which we have many ,as indicated in the beginning of this post. The last few weeks have felt like a neverending parade of bureaucratic potholes, negotiations and indignities. As I said, they're not even the ones I bring on myself, normally. We've spent the last several months refinancing our mortgage, with me playing traffic controller between the lawyers and the insurance and other parties. Among the setbacks was when we law clerk booked us for a meeting... on the previous Monday. We got that straightened out but it was the kind of unforced error that doesn't feel good. Then there's the surrogacy, which, between you and me, has hit a snag we're not sure we can bounce back from and has really put a dark shadow over our house. We're trying not to think about it too much but at the same time we're hanging on by a thread. More tangibly, Mel ordered a chair and I was all set to put it together but a fairly important piece (well I guess they're all important) was defective and it has taken over a week to get it sent to us, being due to arrive on Wednesday. Pretty miffed about that.

Still out of work. Still struggling with money. Still facing an uncertain, directionless future, so, you know. Monday.

In a bit of brightness, last Sunday we went to the Howl-o-ween market after finally putting the finishing touches on Hank's corn costume, spending Saturday assembling it. This is something that Mel has been looking forward to for a long time, including having Hank's costume ready. It was great, except that as soon as we got it on him he shook and the leaves we had hot glued to the sides flew right off with no way to re-secure them (we had brought tape but it wasn't taping.) So he went as a shucked ear of corn and most people got it and liked it and anyway it was more creative than the numerous store-bought costumes (hot dogs, tacos -- which Hank was last year as you'll recall -- bees, etc. Actually I liked the bees.) Hank isn't always sure what to make of other dogs but he was playful with a dog named Joey who was dressed as a cowboy and that was delightful to see. The volunteers remembered Hank and awed over him, and that was nice. It was a beautiful day weather-wise, and a huge turnout, and we didn't spend any money except on a couple of ciders. Didn't even feel the need to get any tacos from the taco truck. We even managed to get a parking space.

So it was good. We're making time for good things and trying to have a nice life while things are crummy around us, but at least the mortgage is done.

Hank seems ready for his walk, and I think that covers all the hard news, which is great because it forces me to forgo the existential quandry of it all and focus on the here and now.

Keep on rockin'

-Scotto

Addendum the following day:

Just to talk a bit more about how Saturday went, we had wanted to get some bagels from Bagel Barn, which is one of our favourite spots but also all the way across town, and when I got back it turned out Mel's was burnt beyond being edible, so I went all the way back and got them to re-make it, which they were glad to do, and even said I could get a free sandwich later (although the process for this seems a little loosey-goosey.) It was hectic and time-consuming but damn were the bagels good in the end. After that we went on a long walk with Hank, with Mel saying let's go to the park and Hank reluctant to turn around and come back (in general he doesn't like to reverse directions without, say, crossing a street.) So we spent a while sitting at the park and fussing with him, and also there was an entire loaf of bread (??) loose on the ground at the playground. I don't know what is up with all this loose food in this town, I s2g.

Anyway, that's more of what life is like here in October, now November, 2025.

KOR-SAW